RE:MIND – FROM BLACK FRIDAY TO A PEACEFUL HEART: Finding Authentic Joy Beyond the Holiday Rush

I’ll be the first to admit I was a little jealous of the bonds and the laughter they shared on those bargain-blitz battlefields, but I also knew myself well enough to realize it was more than I could handle. I mean, let’s be honest: Holiday shopping in general was more than I could handle, and Black Friday was in a league of its own.

Nowadays, the holiday shopping season hits a bit differently. Instead of waiting in line for hours to brave the crowds in physical stores, introverts and sensory sensitives like myself lean heavily (or in my case, exclusively) into online sales. And while the freedom to shop from home has allowed me to escape the sensory overload of the holiday shopping frenzy, that freedom comes at a hefty cost – and not just to my finances.

That’s the thing about our modern conveniences, though, isn’t it? They solve one kind of problem while quietly creating another.

These days, the noise isn’t just coming from the crowds or the car horns; it’s the endless pings, countdown timers, and flash-sale notifications that follow us everywhere we go. What used to be a single chaotic day has become a months-long mental marathon that leaves us feeling completely exhausted.

The bombardment is real. Nowhere is safe, not even our own homes. Yes, holiday shopping can be a nightmare, and shopping from home bypasses a lot of that, but now, instead of getting our shopping done over a few intentional trips, we find ourselves online all the time.

We shop between classes, on our lunch breaks, at work, from the bathroom, late at night, and into the wee, small hours of the morning.

With the ability to browse, shop, and buy at our fingertips, we are always in it. And the longer we stay plugged in, the harder it becomes to tell the difference between what we need and what we’re being conditioned to think we need.

It’s no secret that holiday sales and ad campaigns are rife with psychological triggers designed to get us to buy more. Playing on our worst fears and compulsions, nostalgia, and our innate drive to give and to belong – every detail is painstakingly designed to keep us emotionally invested, to have us reacting rather than thinking. Flash sales, countdown timers, artificially inflated “regular” prices, and that great rush of victory that we experience when we finally ‘score the deal’ all keep us rolling on adrenaline and chasing that next hit of dopamine.

Even the seemingly innocuous act of placing an item into an online shopping cart is contrived to give us a false feeling of ownership that makes it harder to walk away, regardless of whether or not we can afford it. And don’t even get me started on the credit card promotions and buy-now-pay-later options that make overspending during the holidays far too easy.

By the time the season is over, we’re left feeling burnt out, financially depleted, and surrounded by stuff we’ll never use.

So, what do we do? How do we break free of the cycle and reclaim our sanity without forgoing our holiday traditions entirely?

I don’t have a one-size-fits-all answer for this one, but maybe it starts with a breath – with bringing awareness to what no longer serves us and choosing to double down on what does.

Holiday shopping isn’t working for me, but I do love decorating the tree, baking, and watching holiday movies with my family. So, this year, I’m keeping the gift-giving simple: cozy pajamas, handmade ornaments, and gift cards. I’m opting out of email and text notifications and opting into a pajama party with my kids to decorate the tree. And instead of hours spent agonizing online over what to buy, I’ll be spending hours baking delicious holiday goodies and laughing with a few of my favorite people.

I don’t think it matters how you choose to honor the season, only that you slow down enough to enjoy the moments, and honor yourself enough to prioritize peace. The crowds, the chaos, the noise, and the sales – they’re not going anywhere, but neither is our capacity for stillness and joy. In that, we always have the autonomy to choose.

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About This Column: Re:Mind with Jennifer Childers explores the intersections between student life, mental health, and regenerative living – offering space to pause, reflect, and design a life that nourishes you, your community, and the world around you.